How You Can Be Attractive

Well, you've looked over the last post and have seen three Attractive women. Not skinny, well made-up, well-dressed women. Three ATTRACTIVE women.

First let's talks for a moment about what Attractive means. For our purposes, I am going to use this definition straight from the dictionary:

• of or relating to attraction between physical objects

Not sexy, not irresistible, not even pretty. Attractive. Having other people attracted to you, wanting to be around you. These women are Attractive, as looking at them attracts.

First chance you get, I want you to go to W Mitchell's site (click here). When you pull up the site, you will see a man in a wheelchair with extensive burns on his face and hands.

Watch one of his videos for just a couple of minutes and you will feel his attraction.

Okay, okay, I'm there. Here is how YOU become attractive.

There is about 8 square inches on you that will make all the difference in the world. It starts with a smile and ends up in the eyes. When you look someone in the eyes with very real affection (even if you have never met them before) and allow that to become a REAL smile, you will get a positive response. They will become attracted to you and want to be around you.

Practice this. Here are a few things that I do. When I go into a bank I take my time going up to the teller. On my way I slow down and make sure I look at least one Banker sitting at their desk in the eye. I smile and say something nice - and MEAN IT. After a couple of times doing this, I notice that when I go into the bank the Bankers look up and try to be the first one to greet ME. They are attracted to me. And I feel Attractive.

I do this in stores, in the supermarket, even on the street. I tell perfect strangers (mostly women) that I really like their top/shoes/purse. But only when I mean it. Then I make sure they see I mean it. It makes them feel attractive and attracts them to me. Again, I feel Attractive.

So many women have spent some amount of time in their lives picking the wrong man or sequence of men because they believe that the more men that want them the more Attractive they must be. It's time to realize that this is just sex. There has to be some sort of attraction to propagate the species. A true feeling of Attraction comes from either sex at any age and lasts.

I look in the mirror and I see my age and experience. I feel okay with what I see, but just okay.

I look in other people's eyes when I acknowledge that they are Worthwhile and I feel Attractive.

It doesn't matter what you are wearing, what your weight is, how much make-up you have on. I have a few friends who are sight impaired. So it doesn't always mean looking someone in the eye. Simply helping someone else feel Smart, Worthwhile or Attractive and they WILL become attracted to you.

This is one post I would love to hear your responses to - after you have tried this. I want people to share ways they have become attractive.

Meanwhile, remember:

You ARE a SWAN

How to be Attractive

This week we're going to talk about Attractive. Are you Attractive? The only way to know is - Do you feel Attractive? When you feel Attractive, you are Attractive.

Alright, is it now time for tips on make-up? Hair? Weight loss? Clothing?

In this posting, I will show you exactly why these are NOT what we are going to talk about.

Look at this picture:

You may recognize Queen Latifah. A very Attractive woman. And most definitely not a size 3. Nor does she want to be. Nor does she need to be. So, obviously weight, or the lack thereof, is not what makes you Attractive.

Now look at this woman:

No make-up. Hair simply flowing. Yet very Attractive.

One more:

I'm pretty sure she didn't buy this outfit on Rodeo Drive.

Yet Attractive, right?

Now you have an assignment. Before I post next week, look at these pictures and find the common denominator that makes them all Attractive. And, guess what? If you say "self confidence" I would say "NOPE" try again.

Meanwhile remember,

You are a SWAN!

How to be Worthwhile

Last week we talked a little bit about becoming Worthwhile. To repeat myself one more time:

Worthwhile ALWAYS includes someone else.

The dictionary defines Worthwhile: "Of value or importance."

You certainly can say "I have money and a nice house. These have value and are important to me. Doesn't that make me Worthwhile?"

Actually it makes the money and house Worthwhile. You are still simply you. If you think that having a lot of things makes you Worthwhile, stop reading here. You are already right where you want to be.

For the rest of us, let's get past things and onto people.

This week is just a list. Find something on here that you can do do make a difference in someone else's life. Or use this list to give you your own ideas. I certainly don't have all of the ideas cornered:

• When you go shopping, buy a couple of extra cans/boxes of food and drop them into the barrel in the front of the store for the homeless (inexpensive and so necessary)
• Visit an Assisted Living center and ask a resident to tell you stories from the past (they were not dropped there to die, they need stimulation and love to share)
• Compliment a stranger in a store on her blouse/smile/glasses/... (much like the hug in my last posting, you don't know how deeply you can affect someone simply with acknowledgment)
• Change a child's life. This can be done simply by reading a story to a related child, letting them know someone cars. Or you can put time and effort into becoming a Mentor, helping one more child become someone special
• Volunteer. Anywhere. Find your Smart and share it with others. Help someone else become special by sharing what you know and what you can do

Well, here were some thoughts on Worthwhile. Go forth and make a difference, because

You ARE a S.W.A.N!

Next week we will start with How to Be Attractive.